One day at a time

Lately I've been finding myself incredibly stressed out, and not enjoying my knitting so much ( with the exception of my Cherry Tree Hill sock). As I sat at my desk last night at three o'clock in the morning (at work) I started thinking about this. Perhaps it's because I've just gone back to work after a 2 year baby making hiatus, perhaps the lack of sleep I've been getting lately, or maybe even the stress of making a picture perfect Christmas for my 4 kids is it. I'm not too sure. Then It hit me...I'm knitting an awful lot of things for other people (commissioned jobs) and they are all due before Christmas. I've come to the realization that I hate knitting deadlines. I know I have plenty of time to finish the three sweaters (2 kids 1 XL adult), and yet they are the last things on the earth I want to knit. Not the yarn I chose, not the colours I chose, and not even the pattern. (although the kids sweaters are really cute ones from Louisa Harding's Miss Bea's series). On top of all that I have my own holiday gift knitting to finish up. Why do we do these things to ourselves? Forget the fact that I'm trying to finish up writing my own book. I think I need a holiday from knitting...or at least I'll need a really big one once the holidays are over. My problem is I have a hard time saying no to anyone. "Sure that's no problem" is a line heard spewing from my lips all the time. I've decided I'm going to just rip throught the commissioned jobs and then relax. Re-focus on the reasons why I love to knit so much, and stop saying yes to everything and everyone. A girl can only handle so much. I just have to figure out how to say no once in a while. I want to enjoy my kids, and the joy they bring to my life instead of wishing they would just fall asleep already so I can get some work done. They shouldn't have to feel my stress too. Thank God Mr.Man is such a good dad cause I don't know how I'd survive. He gets a really great gift this year. He has yet to bat an eye when I tell him I'm too tired to cook dinner, or could he go buy some more milk since the baby spilled the last of it... men like him are few and far between.